The greatest wisdom comes from those who’ve lived it

“Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.” This quote by American author Mark Twain has always resonated deeply with me, and it beautifully encapsulates why I chose to embark on this journey of befriending the elderly through the C&E course. It serves as a poignant reminder that every crease and line on their face tells a story — a lifetime of joy, love, and cherished memories.

Hello everyone, my name is Qi Qi, and I am a Year 4 Business student. My service learning journey began when I enrolled in GEN2060Y, a course that spanned across Year 3 Semester 2 and Year 4 Semester 1. What started as a simple academic endeavour soon became one of the most profound and meaningful experiences of my university life, one that I will remember for years to come.

As someone who has a soft heart and an innate curiosity about people and the world around me, GEN2060Y stood out to me from the moment I saw the words ‘Senior Befriending.’ The elderly are people who have lived through decades of change, faced challenges, and gathered invaluable wisdom along the way. If you think about it, they truly are living time capsules! To have the opportunity to engage with them, listen to their stories, and learn from their experiences felt like an incredible privilege. Many of these seniors also seek companionship, and to me, being able to offer them a listening ear was just as fulfilling as the lessons they imparted to me in return.

Unfortunately, many in my generation often dismiss the elderly as ‘naggy’ or ‘old-fashioned.’ But this brings me back to the quote at the start of my reflection: “Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.” Their age does not make them any less valuable, and it certainly should not make them invisible. The lines on their faces are not just markers of time, but also evidence of all the smiles they have shared, the hardships they have overcome, and the love they have given. They are just like us, only a few decades ahead in life’s journey.

Yes, their views may differ from ours, but that is exactly what makes befriending them so special. They come from a generation vastly different from ours. When they were young, Singapore was still a fishing village, a developing trading port filled with kampongs and bustling street hawkers. Their stories paint pictures of a Singapore we will never get to witness firsthand, and bring history to life in a way that no textbook ever could. If there is one lesson I have learned, it is this: listen to understand, not to respond. When we take the time to truly listen, we unlock a treasure trove of wisdom, life lessons, and perspectives that are otherwise difficult to come by.

During this course, I had the privilege of befriending three elderly ladies, each with her own unique personality, background, and life story. Every encounter with them was a lesson in resilience, gratitude, and the simple joys of human connection. One particular story that has stayed with me was from Auntie Chua, a single mother who worked tirelessly to support her two young sons after her husband left her. She shared how she had to take on multiple jobs while raising her children alone, often working late into the night just to make ends meet. Yet, despite the hardships, she never once complained. Instead, she spoke with pride about the independence she gained and the joy of seeing her children grow up. Her resilience reminded me that strength is not about avoiding difficulties but about embracing them with determination and love.

Another unforgettable moment was with Auntie Tan, who taught me the importance of appreciating the little things in life. She would always remind me to “go where you want to go, eat what you want to eat,” a simple yet profound reminder that life is short and my days of youth are finite. In today’s fast-paced world, we are often so caught up in chasing goals that we forget to slow down. But watching Auntie Tan smile as she sipped her tea and reminisced about her own youth made me realise that happiness is often found in the simplest moments. She also often spoke fondly of her late husband, who always put her first and cared for her deeply. Though they never had great wealth, their love for each other was abundant, showing me that true richness in life isn’t measured by money, but by the depth of our relationships and connections. In other words, the simple little things.

What made this journey even more special was that our bond did not end with the course. Just last month, my friends and I visited one of them to celebrate her birthday in advance! We surprised her with a cake and spent time catching up. This course is not just about service learning, it is about forming real lasting relationships.